A Funeral Service or a Celebration of Life?
I started Todd Gower Funeral Services because I could see a need in our community for a funeral services firm that isn’t just about funeral services but more about caring for people and providing a service unique to the individual needs of each family.
My Team and I are dedicated to providing people with a service that emphasizes ‘good old fashioned service’. We are passionate about what we do, it is our goal to always go the extra mile for our client families – we take that very seriously. We believe a funeral service should be a true reflection of the deceased. We will take one step further, to ensure you are treated as you deserve to be treated – like a friend.
These days, many people die in a hospital or a nursing home environment. When this occurs, the hospital or nursing home staff take care of the medical formalities.
When a person dies at home with support from hospice or palliative care services, the ‘on duty’ staff will help with the formalities, such as notifying the treating doctor.
The staff from these health services will help you and even call the Funeral Director on your behalf to arrange the transfer of the person who died, to the funeral home.
When an unexpected death occurs in a home, hospital or public place then that death may be referred to the Coroner’s Office. At this point you may require the more immediate assistance of a Funeral Director.
When someone dies in the hospital, the following steps are taken:
- The hospital staff will notify the treating doctor so that the medical death certificate can be completed.
- They will notify the next of kin and family members who will need to contact the Funeral Director. The Funeral Director will arrange for the transfer of the deceased person from the hospital to the funeral home.
- If requested by the family, hospital staff can arrange for the hospital details and deceased person to be released to the Funeral Director.
When someone expectedly dies at home, the following steps should be taken:
- Contact the family doctor to officially verify that death has occurred. Confirm that the doctor will be signing the medical death certificate.
- Notify the next of kin and family members.
- Contact hospice or palliative care services, if they have been involved.
- Contact the preferred Funeral Director to arrange for the transfer of the deceased person to the funeral home.
When the Coroner is Involved
You are not obliged to use the Funeral Director who transported the person’s body for the Coroner after death.
Which Deaths are Reported
Unexpected death. Any death can be unexpected. A doctor who has been regularly treating a patient may have an opinion about the cause of death. However, if the person’s death was not expected at that time by the treating doctor, it needs to be thoroughly investigated.
Accident or injury. Even when the cause of death seems clear, the Coroner still needs to find out what happened. For example, a car accident may have been caused by the driver having a heart attack or by a fault in the car. Identifying what contributed to the accident allows preventative measures to be recommended.
Occurring in an institution. For example, people in policy custody, people in prison, involuntary patients in psychiatric institutions, and children in juvenile justice centres. The death of people in hospitals or nursing homes does not usually need to be reported.
A death must be referred to the Coroner for investigation when:
- The person died unexpectedly.
- The person died from an accident or injury.
- The person died in a violent or unnatural way.
- The person died during or as a result of an anaesthetic.
- The person was ‘in an institution’ immediately before he or she died.
- A doctor has been unable to sign a death certificate giving the cause of death.
- The identity of the person who has died is not known.
Arrangement
This meeting can take place in your home, at the hospital or at the funeral home, whichever is the most convenient for you.
With your advice the Funeral Director will:
- Arrange the transfer of the deceased person to the funeral home.
- Arrange the provision of clothing for the deceased person.
- Prepare and dress the deceased person.
- Schedule a time for viewing of the deceased person at the funeral home or other venue.
- Confirm the most suitable time and day for the funeral.
- Contact and confirm the availability of the Minister or Celebrant.
- Confirm and book the venue, church, chapel or other significant place.
- Confirm the time and book the cemetery or crematorium.
- Record the appropriate personal details and funeral arrangements.
- Determine the number of pall bearers required.
- Order the floral arrangement for the casket.
- Record the selected type of casket.
- Type and fax the death and funeral notices.
- Provide envelopes and collection box for donations to a charity – if required.
Venues
Where the funeral service is to be held is an important aspect of funeral planning.
If a person is a member of a religious congregation, often the service will be held in the local church. Sometimes a larger venue is required and the service should be held in the most appropriate setting.
Depending on the size of the funeral, families sometimes choose the location based on how many people are likely to attend the funeral. Some examples are Olive Tree Cottage, Holy Trinity Anglican Church, The Elms Mission Chapel, and Baycourt Theatre.
Funeral services can also be held in the family home or any other setting that has significance for the person who has died and their family – in the garden, at the beach, on the farm, even in the bush – whatever will help reflect the life and loves of the deceased person.
The Funeral Service
It is the Funeral Director’s predominant role to make all the relevant arrangements prior to conducting the funeral service.
The Funeral Director works with the Minister or Celebrant to ensure that any of the family’s special requests (e.g. music, flowers, photos, and candles) are available in time for the funeral service.
The Funeral Director will discuss with family members whether an audio visual presentation is an option and arrange for collection of any photos and music to be used.
The Minister or Celebrant is ultimately responsible for what happens during the funeral service. This usually involves working with family members to:
- Plan the format of the funeral service.
- Decide who will deliver the eulogy – family members or a close personal friend.
- Select the music, reading or poetry for the service.
- Decide on the use of other items such as candles, flowers and photos.
- Discuss whether an order of service is required.
- Decide when the audio visual presentation will be scheduled in the service.
Embalming
The care and respect given to a deceased person begins with the transfer from the place of death to our funeral home. All our transfer staff are fully trained in conducting the transfer of the deceased in a dignified and caring manner whether this occurs from a private home, hospital or more public place.
This standard of care continues right through the entire process of the funeral preparations to the final resting place.
We have experienced embalmers on staff who take care of the preparation of the deceased. Each body is handled as if family members are present in the preparation room throughout.
We attach a great deal of significance to the preparation of a deceased person for viewing. The dressing and grooming of the deceased is part of this process.
Our mortuary staff takes great care to ensure that the deceased person always looks peaceful and is well cared for. We always ask our Funeral Directors to make sure that full clothing has been supplied (underwear, makeup) and a photograph help with details of hairstyles and makeup applications.
The end result of mortuary care is that the deceased person has been presented in a safe, clean and hygienic way. This helps to ensure a pleasant memory of the deceased is attained.
Viewing
Some people find it helpful to spend time with their loved one before the funeral. This special time is an opportunity to say goodbye, and begin to bring some closure to the relationship.
A viewing can assist in the grieving process as it allows people to begin to accept the reality of the death of their loved one. It can be a time to place mementos such as cards, letters, small gifts, photos, flowers and other significant objects in the coffin with the person.
Children benefit from being included in the preparations for a funeral. Viewing the body of someone they love who has died can be a positive experience, as it allows the child to say ‘goodbye’ and helps him or her to accept the reality of death.
Children should have the same opportunity to view the deceased person and be allowed to attend the funeral if they want to.
Caskets
We provide a variety of caskets ranging from, particleboard, solid timber, and custom lacquered, to (Eco) environmentally friendly caskets.
Oversize and undersize caskets are also available as required. There is a range of small caskets for children.
Environmentally friendly caskets:
- Constructed of fully sustainable timber such as pine and macrocarpa.
- Bio degradable interior lining.
- Individually handcrafted.
- Caring for our environment.
Particleboard caskets:
- Constructed of wood particles and resins.
- Covered with appropriate wood or paper veneer.
- Variety of finishes.
- Include interior lining & decorative handles.
Solid timber caskets:
- Warmth and beauty of natural wood
- Individually handcrafted.
- Variety of timbers – all solid wood.
- Satin interior
Custom lacquered caskets
- Any of the above caskets (except the Eco range) may be lacquered in a high gloss paint finish – perhaps your loved one’s favourite colour.
Music, Flowers and Catering
Symbols
The use of symbols in a funeral service can enhance the significant aspects of a person’s life, and help create a very personal atmosphere for the service. Photos and flowers add to the ambience that is being created.
Candles are generally recognized as a universal symbol of love, light and hope. Candle lighting during the service is always a very poignant ritual.
A flag draped over a coffin, the playing of the Last Post and the red poppies used in the RSA tribute speak to us of a person’s contribution to his or her country.
Other flags symbolic of the deceased’s country of birth are also available.
Academic, sporting or community achievement awards also tell us what has been achieved in a person’s life.
Art, craft, other artefacts and hobbies add to the dimension of the person whose life is being honoured.
Music
Music speaks to our hearts – especially in a funeral service. The selection and use of music usually sets the emotional tone of the service.
Music can be played from tapes or CD’s, or by engaging musicians who play organs, guitars, keyboard, bagpipes, or the bugle.
Choirs, singers and soloists can also be arranged for a service.
Todd Gower Funeral Services has an extensive co library – if we do not have it we will do our best to get it for you.
Flowers
Flowers are another symbol used at funerals. You can usually choose a favourite flower or combination of flowers and colours for a floral casket spray. Single flowers, or a bunch of flowers tied with ribbon can also be used.
The types and sizes of floral arrangements can vary. Some of the options available are:
- Casket Spray
- Floral Tributes
- 12 red roses can be an effective option too.
Some people have used baskets of vegetables, sports equipment and other items to personalise the floral tribute.
Instead of sending flowers, families sometimes prefer to invite friends to make a donation to a particular charity or community or health service in memory of the person who has died.
We will ensure that envelopes for donations are available at the service and are delivered to the organization after the funeral.
Catering
The offering of refreshments after a funeral is regarded as an important aspect of the service itself.
This is a time for meeting up with family members, sharing stories and recalling in greater detail the life of the deceased person. Sometimes this is the only opportunity for a family reunion.
Catering for refreshments at other venues can be arranged.
Funeral Options
If you wish to be buried in a cemetery “outside” your rateable area, you will probably be charged an “out of district fee”.
Each cemetery in our region regulates what can occur by providing “bylaws” which are the rules under which Funeral Directors must operate. If you request something outside the bylaws, you will be asked to negotiate with the sexton directly.
Cemetery Fees cover: purchase of the plot, maintenance fees, interment fees, green matting, a grave marker and extra depth to allow for a second interment at a later date.
After the Funeral Service
After the funeral families may wish to:
- Consider options for a headstone or plaque by contacting our Funeral Director.
- Reply to sympathy cards and floral tribute cards.
- Consider placing a ‘thank you’ notice in the newspaper.
- Arrange for the ashes interment, that is, where to store or scatter the cremated remains. We can arrange this to be in a memorial garden or other place such as on a beach, in a forest, out at sea or from the air.
Planning Ahead
Although we do not like to think about it much – the day will come when we will need the services of a Funeral Director.
We probably all hope that this day will be later rather than sooner, and that our family will know what to do when it comes to organizing the funeral.
Some people feel comfortable about leaving this responsibility to their family, while others prefer to be a little more organised by planning and even paying for their funeral ahead of time.
There are many advantages in planning ahead:
- To relieve some of the emotional stress on your family.
- To reduce the financial burden that the cost of a funeral may present.
- Gives you the opportunity to crease a meaningful funeral ceremony – one that reflects who you are and what was significant for you throughout your life.
- A ceremony that gives those left behind something to remember and cherish, easing their pain of loss and grief.
